How to mix up tradition for your LGBTQ+ Wedding


Let all us queers rejoice for until very recently the dream of getting married seemed like a distant legend. Something that made our LGBTQ+ relationships seem ‘less’ than those of the straight variety. But let's not wallow in this any longer, for we are here to celebrate the joys of life! 

You are likely here because you are wanting to mix up a traditional wedding to be a bit more modern and fit in your queer aesthetic. So how do we fit our unique companionships up to the traditional expectation of a marriage between a ‘man’ and a ‘woman’? We break them of course as we show that regardless of who you are you deserve happiness and the ability to get married to whomever you want!

Break Gender Roles


Wedding traditions typically have roles assigned to the bride and groom of the event -including the attendance parties of both partners.  A woman wears a white dress and will walk up the altar to meet her suited husband at the end. There are traditional phrases giving the husband permission to kiss his bride –rewrite these scripts for your day!

Queer weddings often do away with these formal traditions with their own unique scripts and rites carried out for their special day. For example, two women both wearing suits walk up the altar at the same time. Or one woman wearing a suit waiting for their partner to arrive wearing a dress. 

Gay men chop and change their rites in a similar manner to a gay woman couple. They are not concerned about also playing into gender roles to point out how silly it is that men believe they can’t wear dresses. They do this by wearing a dress and might pose as a drag queen bride, arriving up to the altar to meet their suited husband. 

Embrace ‘The Gay’

Equally Wed

Via: Equally Wed

A great thing about the LGBTQ+ community is the fact that they are unapologetically loud and proud about their identities and this is shown through not just their everyday dress sense, but the parties they throw! So of course when they get married it will be fun, bright, and possibly a little crazy at times the further they push the traditional boundaries of a wedding.

You could have a crazy loud party at both the reception and afterparty. Have a grand stage for everyone to watch you tie the knot! Make everyone feel all the range of emotions and keep them on their toes. Why be boring?

But if you wanted to balance it out so the magic and focus of your special day are not lost in the noise you could have a more traditional service and save the music for after. Of course, you could replace the standard celibate with a drag king or queen. 

Get Married at a Famous Queer Landmark

Curbed SF

Curbed SF

Depending on where you live you most certainly know of a famous queer landmark that might be a perfect setting for your GAY wedding! Perhaps you have a gay bar that would be great for the afterparty and is super queer-friendly so both you and your wedding guests will feel right at ease.

Maybe your city has a gay-friendly church or a minister is gay themselves? You can go a bit traditional here and get married under the house of God in a space where you know you’ll be loved and accepted.

Stumped on where to take photos? Create a map of all the queerest places in your town and go on the tiki tour to each of them. Shed light on the often hidden cultural presence of your LGBTQ+ community. Celebrate your unique experience and be unbashfully yourself. We also have a guide to help you take 10 awesome weddings pics!

Lots of Rainbows…


The brightest color is of course one that has them all –a rainbow! It is the symbol of pride for queer people and is often embraced as they come out of the closet to tell everyone around them that they will not hide anymore!

Fill your whole reception and event with rainbows and symbols of the amazing queer identity. You can be subtle or bold with this, but if you go all out you will be surprised by just how many rainbow options there are for decoration! 

To begin with, the cake will have to have no less than six layers each with a different color and you could even extend this to the choice of flavors. Then if you wanted to include the symbol in your dress or suit, you could have a badge or get a complete outfit fitted to show your love for the rainbow.

…And Unicorns

Jewish Wedding Blog

Via: Jewish Wedding Blog

Now you are probably asking about the unicorn at this point. And yes, I understand that we all would love to see a real unicorn. The horned beast once symbolized purity, grace, protection, color, and rarity. However, in the last decade, they have become gay icons to represent the special nature of being a part of the LGBTQ+ community. 

It is not surprising that like with rainbows, the queer community would also include unicorns as a witness as they tied the knot too! They don’t just have to be colorful beasts too, as you can see from the example of the picture above which shows a gay Jewish couple riding a ‘unicorn’ at their wedding. 

Final Remarks


Have as many unicorns as you have rainbows the queerer you want to go for your wedding! To throw away traditions and embrace your unique identity.

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